Kathryn Hodgson

Following your dreams

The beginning of the year is traditionally a time when we stop and think about where we are in life, and if this is what we want. As you take stock, are you proud of what you have achieved so far? Or have you settled for ‘this is how it is and I can’t change it’? You can. You can have the life you dream of no matter where you are right now. It may take some time to get though; we are so used to getting everything immediately that we think a few years is too long to wait. But think about it – say it takes 3 years to make your dream life happen, you still have say 20, 30 or even 40 years left to enjoy it! And better still – get to enjoy making it happen too. A dream life doesn’t have to be anything huge either – it can be being healthy and confident, with a loving family, doing a job you enjoy with no money worries, or just having better relationships with your family.

Now this is where the excuses start to pop up – I don’t know what I want/ I can’t afford it/ I’m too busy/ stressed/ shy.... whatever fits for you. These obstacles can be overcome with a little work from you, and maybe a little help from someone who knows how (like me). People tend to think in order to follow their dream they have to abandon their family and job, or take a pay cut at least, so don't even consider it. Who told you that rubbish? You can be pursuing your dream whilst everything else is still in place, it just takes a bit of creativity. And what better example to set your children than to believe they can be all they want to be.

One of the most common excuses is not believing you can get your dream life. Why not? The only people who tell you that are those who gave up on their dreams too soon, and are trying to protect you from the disappointment they felt. The reality is – if they kept going they would have achieved it. Actors and actresses can go to hundreds of auditions before getting a break, many bestselling books got rejected repeatedly to begin with, and the examples go on. Yet here we are thinking we should achieve our dreams first time or give up (and then moan that it’s OK for the lucky ones who made it).

I recently attended a seminar where we were told that the only reason people are not successful in following their dreams is that they either don’t know how, or do but don’t put it into action. And that is true. There have been many studies on how people have achieved their dreams, and they all followed the same principles. If you do the same then you too can achieve your dreams – guaranteed.

Here are a few of the principles:

Attitude – you have to believe you can make it happen, and do what it takes

Define your dream – rather than just wanting to be famous – for what? What do you want to be spending your time doing? With whom? Where? Be careful of dreams that are purely to heal past injustice, eg. to prove people wrong, these will not get you what you want. Heal, and then find what you want to do because you love doing it.

Research – there is probably someone out there who has done what you want to do, or similar, and has written a book or is running courses in how to do it. The internet is a good place to start. There is also lots of support and help for you that you are probably unaware of, including financial.

Goal setting – instead of feeling overwhelmed with how big your dream is, work backwards to find what you can do today to get closer to it. You have to have a plan.

Support – you need to have people who will encourage you, if someone is being negative about it – either avoid them or don’t talk to them about it.

 There are many other tricks you can learn to make it easier and to keep motivated, and plenty of books and courses to show you how. So in reality – not getting the life you want is simply down to you deciding you don’t want to put in the effort.  Even if you have to learn how to be confident enough to go for your dreams first – do it. You deserve it.